If you'd like to see other quick takes, go visit Jen.
~1~
It's been a quiet week here. If you've emailed or messaged me since last weekend I probably haven't gotten back to you (but I will try before the end of the weekend). I haven't been much on the message boards I typically frequent, or even online at all. Sorry about that, but it was much needed quiet.
~2~
I was "that mom" on three separate occasions this week - once in the post office while I held a hysterical toddler (hysterical because I wouldn't let him just wander about the place), once in the middle of Target when my 4-year-old threw himself to the ground and then kicked me in the shin (over my refusal to buy candy), and once in a parking lot where I wrestled with Ezra for what felt like 10 years to buckle him into his car seat as I said over and over, "Car seats are not negotiable!" while people walked by staring at me.
I'm tired. And it feels like the boys are ganging up on me sometimes.
The reality is that they could tell that I was on edge and they hadn't seen their Daddy in almost three days, so they were on edge too. Extra sleep and good food is a great cure for edginess.
~3~
So I've been hiding out, spending a lot of time cooking and talking with Ender, changing little bits of our routine to make it easier on me, reading for a few hours after the boys are in bed (real books, not online), and getting to bed early. I needed a massive recharge.
~4~
When Superman came home on Wednesday, there was a long discussion about why we're doing this- why I'm working, why he's taking such a heavy course load this semester and next, where we want to be by this time next year and 5 years from now.
A re-focus, if you will, partnered with lots of prayer.
A reminder of what my husband has asked me to do, a reminder that this is indeed a short season, and that life will be peaceful again in just a few months.
~5~
In my non-online, post-little-boy-bedtime free time this week I've:
:: Cut pieces for 6 pairs of pajamas for the boys
:: cut material for two new slips for myself and one new skirt
:: cut beautiful, beautiful Alexander Henry fabric for a sunny apron to help me through the dim winter months
:: Read 3 books
:: cast on wristers for myself
:: cleaned my sewing table so I can actually sew for the first time in a few weeks. This is the weekend. Next week might be a million crafting posts since I have about a million things simply waiting to be made.
~6~
Why has Superman been away so much this week, you ask? Well, after work he's had at least one school-related stop to make each day- new classes started up, he had to do the whole advisor things one night to deal with the special requirements of applying for graduation and taking a last competency exam. He's been home every night, but between some craziness at work with late hours and his combination of class nights he didn't see the boys awake any time from Sunday evening until Wednesday night, and then only for an hour or so before bed. He had class last night, but thankfully once he's home tonight he'll be home until Monday morning.
We so need this time with him.
~7~
The most helpful bit of this week? An hourly schedule. A simple thing really, but I need something mindless so I could just look at the list and do whatever it said. 9 o'clock? School things with Ender. 10 o'clock? Off to the kitchen to take care of a few more of those apples. Laundry? Meals? Even reading? All on the list, designated to a time when I knew it would be taken care of.
I don't generally like to be told what to do with every minute of my day, but I needed it this week. I'm thankful for this coming weekend and the free time held there.
Time with Superman and my boys.
Time to sew.
Time to be outside, take a picnic (perhaps for the last time this season), and just be.
Posts
I feel like you in some respects today. I have many knitting projects I want to complete, one of which is a set of 6 hand puppets for my grandchildren. I've had the patterns waiting for over a year! Time to begin. This weekend I need to get going on the details: orange yarn for the beaks, black for the raccoon's markings, curly yarn for the lamb. But I also want to start a little sweater, find a pattern for some variegated wool, etc.
ReplyDeleteI also need to finish up tons of garden work: cutting back ornamental grasses, preparing roses and clematis for winter snows, caging shrubs against critter damage and much more. Then there's reading for my book club, caring for our dog who has a knee problem, ...
DH is a professor, so his classes and students are in the midst of projects which require much attention. In addition we have political/environmental concerns to deal with, meetings, etc.
My children are 33 and 38. I think of them constantly...with concern as well as pride.
A friend reminds me of the 80/20 rule:
" in most situations in life (marriage, work, etc), you can only realistically expect 80% to be exactly the way you want it, the other 20% will always be a work in progress. And you have to consciously focus on (and appreciate) the 80% while you work on the 20%. Unfortunately, many people focus on the 20% and take the 80% for granted....and that's where trouble starts. I know it may sound simplistic, but I really believe when you cut to the chase, it's true. So, when I'm miserable at work or find myself worrying about my son on the road to/from school or any of the other things that make up the 20% that isn't perfect, I really make myself focus on how great the 80% is. And I usually feel much better.
I don't believe you should ignore the 20%.....you have to work TOGETHER on those things that aren't right. But work on them through the prism of the 80% that is great. My wife and I have this funny little habit....whenever we're fussing over something that isn't what we want it to be (kids, work, whatever), one of us usually looks at the other and says "I love you". We don't do it consciously or in a calculated way, I think it's just our way of reminding ourselves of the 80% when we're working on the 20%. "
;)