I read Jennifer's post on stewardship yesterday and didn't post here because the post I was working on wasn't relevant after reading her article. Head over there and read for a minute. I'll wait.
Seriously.... go read it.
I used to scrapbook a lot when my oldest son was born and I read all kinds of scrapbooking magazines. I remember a particular article about a woman who was trying to put together a scrapbook of her mother's life. Her mother had died awhile ago and she wanted to put something together for her own children to have as a keepsake of their grandmother. She was posing a question to the scrapping experts about how to create a keepsake like that when you can only find a handful of pictures of that person. That day I realized that if something happened to me, we had only a few pictures of me with my son. And since then I've given my camera to someone else to take pictures for me. I want to be the one actually in the pictures and being a part of the birthday party, rather than always the one behind the camera.
I've been feeling really stretched lately. Between the regular demands of mothering, working and being a wife, I've been trying to meet many other expectations as well , and I think that's why I've been feeling like there is just so much to do and never enough time to do it all. Jennifer's post has been on my mind since I read it and I've been sorting out in my mind the distinction between my true priorities and the things that I say yes to that threaten my priorities. I've never thought about it that way- that when I say yes to too many things I'm actually stealing from the commitments that are far more important to me, and I can't do that anymore.
Superman and I have a tradition of going to lunch together without the kids a few days before the beginning of the new year and sharing our wishes for the new year. One of mine is to learn to say "no" to new commitments if they take away from my priorities, and to have a good plan in place about which things need to go and which ones need to stay. I suppose I'll hang on to Superman and the boys . . .
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I'm not sure who Jennifer is or how to access her blog, but I DO know about the problem of saying no. I think I was well into my 40s when I conquered that problem, but I don't know why it took so long. I think it had something to do with the fact that people asked me to do things that were honorable and good....like canvassing for the cancer society for example...and how could I say no to those things?
ReplyDeleteEventually I had to take stock of the things I HAD done in the past and realize that many of those were also valuable achievements. (I had taught in West Africa, helped ghetto kids read, volunteered with teen parents to help prevent child abuse, taught literacy and English as a foreign language and more.) I did not have to be "guilt tripped" into doing more altruistic activity.
I also needed to do for myself and my family. That too is a noble job if done well. You can't help others well if you are dissatisfied with yourself. You can be quite the role model if you enjoy the beauty around you, make things of beauty or return things to beauty. You can teach others to be observant and joyful too, to care for the environment that we all share. I think doing a few things well is often more satisfying than spreading yourself thin, trying to please many without pleasing yourself.
Enjoy lunch out with Superman!
OK, once the cat moved away from my screen, I saw how to access Jennifer's blog and read her words. I also saw how many relate to this topic with their comments.
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